I Don’t Know if I’m Healing or Just spiraling

Some days I think I’m doing the work. Other days I wonder if I’m just dressing it up in reflection.

I sit with the pain, but is that healing-or am I just letting it echo over and over without change? I cry. I question. I reflect. But is that growth- or avoidance in disguise?

I’ve asked myself: Am I really aligning? Or am I chasing signs, spinning in circles, calling it spiritual?

Am I grounding into truth? Or just bypassing the discomfort by performing “awareness”?

I’m not sure that’s the honest answer.

But maybe the fact that I’m asking the question means I am doing something. Maybe this part-the confusion, the doubt, the hesitation to label anything-" “healed”- is still part of the healing.

I don’t need it to look polished. I don’t need it to feel linear. I just need to stay here- with myself- without running.

Even if I don’t have the answers yet.